dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
