she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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