cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
