3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
His hands were made for my vagina.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
