I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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