i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
