Will you blow on my dice?
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Randomize
