I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
