barbara walters just said penis...
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize