I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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