Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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