He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
