I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
