What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
