rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
