Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
