Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
