I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Randomize
