remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
