Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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