I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
FUCK WHALES
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
