It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Randomize
