We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
