Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Everyone says I win the strip club
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
