so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
