next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
can u get pink eye on your cock?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
