Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
