At least make sure they are 18
Why
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
we're making bets on your personal life
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
