Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
They took my balls.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
