glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I skipped work to stalk him.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
