Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
