I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
