you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
