I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
