I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
