I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
