Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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