You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
