it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
