I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
