I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
