Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
