smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
