smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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