so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
