i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize