he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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