I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
