But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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