Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
